Ugh! It is back!!!!!!!!!

My Sarcoidosis is back again in my right eye and nastier than ever. I was in such pain before but I took two Alieve and it has calmed down to a dull ache. I am just so mad that it came back again so fast. Greg was going to call to make an appointment for the scan, and I have to get blood work to see how my anemia is doing. I feel so tired I just know it is low. This has been going on so long. I was so happy when I was drug free, but that doesn’t seem to be the plan for me. I am probably going back on the eye drops again, but not the Percocet. For the moment the Alieve is working OK so I do not want to take anything stronger.

Needless to say until I get my last bone scan and bone marrow biopsy that TTCing is out. I can’t possible introduce any baby to those chemicals even if I were lucky enough to get pregnant. My luck I probably would, so I won’t even try. Good thing for us is that I actually can’t get “accidentally” pregnant. We have to try.

Lara is not having an easy go of it at school. She clings to me every morning and makes a scene. She does not want to leave me and we are not sure why. I personally think she is afraid if she goes I will get sick and end up in the hospital or dead. She says she wants to stay home and be a little girl with me. We already bought our Halloween costumes. Lara and I are going to be matching ladybugs and Anthony will be a bee. We bought wings at “Claire’s” last week. All I need is pants and shirts. Lara wants to be all sparkly with me. I am in shock as this is just not like her. She doesn’t usually go for the glam. Last year she was “Thomas The Tank” for Halloween. So I am not sure what is going on in her head. This year she has regular class and then special ed classes for math and writing. So far all we have gotten at home is one work sheet where she wrote “h’s” down. Ugh he is past writing letters and I hope she starts on words soon. She started religion class on Sunday but would not let me go so I stayed with her. She cried a lot. Unfortunately a girl from her class was there and saw this. In line on Monday she was telling another girl all about it. I stopped her and asked her if it happened to her would she like others talking about it? She said no, but I know she gossiped about it later. She just had a defiant look in her eye.

Anthony is doing OK. He plays quietly mostly during the day. He does like to open things, climb and explore so I have to keep an eye on him when it gets too quiet. KWIM? He is still working on his alphabet, and watches the Leap frog DVD’s.

Greg has a cold now and is teaching a class so he can not call in sick. Now after work he has to drive me to the doctor. I feel bad for him.